How Do You Combine Your Talents and Interests?

The last two weeks have been eye-opening. As I try to figure out what the hell this stay-at-home stuff is about, it changes daily.

First, I thought I would play the Happy Housewife, tending to our home, planning the meals. I rather enjoyed lip-synching to Fergalicious while dusting, but had an eerie feeling I am supposed to do a bit more with my life.

A new semester began around the same time I quit my job, so I dove into modern economic thought and became the Serious Student. After I scored well on my first exam, I decided I could devote time to other things and figured it was time to up the ante my blog, write about more meaningful topics. What ensued was the role of Angry Activist. I started a series called, “What’s Wrong with the World Wednesdays” which has proved interesting, educational, and traumatic. I’m not down with being berated by strangers and dishing it out as the main focus of my writing.

The bottom line is that that none of these roles works for me completely. But they are all part of me. How do I combine them all together into something that makes sense? I won’t be happy if I’m just one of these people. I never have been. I’ve always had multiple jobs, multiple courses of study at a time, I thrive with variety (which is why when I stayed home all week last week I lost my mind.)

When I don’t know what to do, and have worked myself into a conundrum, the first thing I do is declare, “I suck, and everyone hates me.” Thank God I’m married, because my husband just laughs at me, whereas in my single days I’d take that bullshit to heart. So, he laughs, I turn on my heels and move on to the next question which is, “Now what?” What do I do with my new discoveries? If I can’t blame it on sucking or on being unaccepted by society-at-large, what could it be?

I don’t know. I feel like I’m on the cusp of something. Obviously I’m living a life dramatically different from my past, and I’m a bit disjointed, but I’m by no means floundering. I just need to figure out how to combine my talents into something cohesive that makes sense.