Quiet the Thunder: A Manifesto

photo by Ingorrr
Yes, it is time to write a manifesto. (It was inspired by the manifesto of a friend's husband's blog - so a lot of my thoughts here are borrowed, but he expressed so perfectly why one blogs...) At first I thought posting this, or this, would be enough, but it's not. It's also possible that family members, friends, exes, enemies, current, past, or future employers may read any number of things I've written online and, well...wonder.

Some of my thoughts are angry, some are depressed, some are just weird. If that is your only exposure to my personality, don't convince yourself those are the only aspects of my personality. Generally, they are the only ones that require some kind of additional outlet and expression. If I was always feeling happy and at-ease in the world, I probably wouldn't have a blog. Furthermore, no one would read it, because reading about happy people makes other people depressed and cynical. Okay, maybe that's just me.

You see, this blog started out as a reservoir for my thoughts during a turbulent time. And you know what? It helped a lot. I don't know how well I would be doing about my dad's death if it weren't for this blog. Know what else? Turbulent times and emotions don't go away and I'm pretty much entitled to any damn feeling I want as long as I'm not hurting anyone else. I've always been more comfortable expressing myself through writing, where I can contemplate, revise, elaborate.

I'd much rather express myself here, than carry my feelings out into the world at large. Blogging allows me to get everything out, precisely so I don't feel stuck and act irrationally. So if you come across a post where I'm *gasp* a little bit less than totally impartial - you're going to have to grow up and deal with that. This is my blog, my party, my thoughts. You don't get to use them against me, or use them as a reason to put me down. I don't do that to you.

To be perfectly honest, I don't write to please anyone but myself, nor should I - it's a blog! If you know me, you might find my thoughts surprising, if you don't know me, they could be wildly misconstrued. Blogging is one of those things where, unless you don't allow anyone to read it (counter to its purpose) or comment on it (no fun), you are bound to allow people into your life who aren't particularly interested in the sensitivity or subtley of allowing you to express yourself without ridicule. I get it. But I don't like it, and quite frankly, I'm tired of it.

Even still, I don't think blogging is a mistake, because I have said many times there are far more sincere, intelligent, and thought-provoking people who post comments more often than those who don't. I learn a lot from them. And that's the most important reason to blog, to learn more about myself. So if you've happened upon my words, and they have upset you for some reason, perhaps this could be your chance to start your own blog about what you are going through...instead of ridiculing me on mine.

Peace, Love, & Thanks. Milena